In today’s session, I want to dive compassionately into this topic as it’s something I see destroying our community on so many levels. First, I feel it’s important to say that the fear of being visible for melanated folks is not a personal failing but a protective strategy that has deep roots in our traumatic […]
Are you the workplace mammy?
Last week I saw a really cringy interview with Drew Barrymore and Vice President Kamala Harris (USA) where she was asking her to be the county’s ‘Mamula.’ It was clearly giving, ‘be the black mammy’ vibes and there were a lot of us on social media saying how tired they were of having this stereotype […]
How does slavery continue to destroy secure childhood attachment today?
Chattel slavery kept mothers and babies in bondage for centuries, so it’s important to explore how it still impacts our community today. Frederick Douglass was an iconic African American abolitionist, writer, speaker, and statesman. Born into slavery in Talbot County, Maryland around 1818, he escaped in 1838 and became one of the leading voices in the fight against […]
Changing patterns?
The things that kept us soothed and safe as children in dysfunctional families can block us from what we need as adults. Journaling can help us identify any recurring patterns, beliefs, and behaviours that no longer serve us. Exploring these experiences compassionately can give us clarity on how the past continues to bleed into the […]
The Power of Kitty Calm.
Ever since I was a little girl, cats have always been a great source of comfort. There’s something so settling about being around the purring and ‘biscuit’ making. When I had no safe people to turn to, my cat with the only consistent love I knew. There’ve been many times when I’ve been upset and […]
What exactly does justice for your inner child mean?
One of the most powerful aspects of my work is holding space for a client’s inner child to emerge. It can take a while before this younger part of ourselves feels safe enough to come out from where they’ve been hiding. Sometimes I’ll need to slow them down from intellectualising and using words to cover […]
Recognizing Coping Mechanisms
The things that kept us soothed and safe as children in dysfunctional families can block us from what we need as adults. Journaling can help us identify any recurring patterns, beliefs, and behaviours that no longer serve us. Exploring these experiences compassionately can give us clarity on how the past continues to bleed into the […]
How do childhood attachment patterns impact our adult relationships?
In a healthy mother and baby relationship, a secure attachment is formed when they are responsive and can provide nurturing care, protection, and emotional support. Building a secure attachment is important for: Babies’ brain development. Learning to self soothe. Feeling deserving of care. Seeding self esteem. The first experience of love. Building confidence to communicate […]
Shut Your Inner Critic Up!
Journaling is a powerful tool to unpack, explore and change the relationship with your inner critic which is often in our unconscious chattin’ sh*t. Understanding the intersections of racism, oppression and gender within your family of origin or wider society is an important starting point to explore how we internalise the negative messages at a […]
If you’re hysterical, it’s historical! 5 Inner child wounds you need to heal.
If you’re hysterical, it’s historical! I first heard this phrase in recovery and it helped me explore how my past was leaking into my present. If you were hurt as a child without having a safe adult to support and soothe you, you may have buried these layers of pain to cope. If you struggle […]