Changing patterns?

The things that kept us soothed and safe as children in dysfunctional families can block us from what we need as adults. Journaling can help us identify any recurring patterns, beliefs, and behaviours that no longer serve us. Exploring these experiences compassionately can give us clarity on how the past continues to bleed into the present and reveal what healing support we need for the future.

 

This week’s heartwork: Reflect on the coping mechanisms you developed as a child to navigate difficult emotions, situations and/or family dynamics. Are there any patterns or behaviours from childhood that you still find yourself repeating as an adult?

 

If you found this heartwork valuable and would like to explore deeper healing, there are additional journal prompts available free in the Sista Sanctuary.  Click here to join the sistahood today.

Recognizing Coping Mechanisms

The things that kept us soothed and safe as children in dysfunctional families can block us from what we need as adults. Journaling can help us identify any recurring patterns, beliefs, and behaviours that no longer serve us. Exploring these experiences compassionately can give us clarity on how the past continues to bleed into the present and reveal what healing support we need for the future.

This week’s heartwork: Reflect on the coping mechanisms you developed as a child to navigate difficult emotions or situations. Are there any patterns or behaviors from childhood that you still find yourself repeating as an adult?

Click here to join the Sacred Sista Sanctuary.

Shut Your Inner Critic Up!

Journaling is a powerful tool to unpack, explore and change the relationship with your inner critic which is often in our unconscious chattin’ sh*t. Understanding the intersections of racism, oppression and gender within your family of origin or wider society is an important starting point to explore how we internalise the negative messages at a young age to become our inner critic. 

 

The goal is not to hate that part of yourself, but to build a relationship with it so it no longer dominates your thinking or sabotages your future choices. 

 

This week’s heartwork: Tune into the voices of your inner critic. What messages do you hear from this critical voice, and where/who do you think they originated from in your childhood? Does your inner critic treat your inner child the way your parents treated you?

If you found this heartwork valuable and would like to explore deeper healing, there are additional journal prompts available for free in the Sista Sanctuary.

Click here to join the sistahood today.

 

Umoja (Unity) in sistahood.

My inspiration for today’s live was sparked from one of my favourite influencers, Candice Brathwaite. Candice’s fear and vulnerability during a dentist visit came with unexpected gentleness and care that brought her to tears. This really moved me and brought up reflections on so many of my clients exploring the impact of unmet maternal needs and the yearning for nurturing from women who look like them.

The discomfort often experience between black women often arises from unresolved mother wounds that create barriers to authentic connections. These painful dynamics are often hidden and is the reason why I’m so passionate about creating safe spaces where black women can unpack these issues without fear of judgment, and embrace the joy in receiving care and sisterly support. In a society where conversations about maternal relationships are often stifled, my platform stands as a sanctuary, offering solace and understanding to those seeking unity in sisterhood. Details about the Sista Sanctuary and the Heal and Chill session can be found at www.heal.juneallen.net

The 4 black women who keep me straight when I’m strugglin’.

Despite all the stuff I share about taking care of yourself, I am human which means that sometimes there are days when I just feel like sh*t. With parenting, college essays and dealing with menopausal hormonal insomnia, things sometimes feel really hard. It’s during these times when I lean on my powerful sacred sista squad to put me straight. In this weeks live I share about the amazing black women in my life that nurture, advise, support and keep me accountable.

Goddesses Gone Wild!

Last week was one of the goddess’s birthday (Yvonne far left) so we gathered at her home to catch up. What ensued was a wonderful evening of food, conversation, dancing and an abundance of silliness that left us with sore jaws.

What I learned from the evening is that sometimes you don’t know how much you miss something until you’re reminded of how you feel in the experience.

My friendship circle has changed a lot over the years as I’ve grown and I’m so grateful to be part of this group of women who make no apologies for taking up space in their respective worlds and empower those around them to do the same whenever life gets wobbly.

I share this to remind you of the importance of checking your sistahood circle. Are you able to share your challenges, joy and dreams with them without judgement or jealously? Can they hold a space for you during challenging times like you do for them?

Sometimes, we hold onto things longer than we should because we get comfortable or are afraid of letting change help us grow. If you’re the smartest sista in your circle, maybe its time to review what your values and needs are around friendship?

In this moment, I will reclaim my right to be nurtured by other black women and explore my friendship needs. Today, I will reach to the sista’s that love me and tell them how much I love them. 

Should you join the Sacred Sista Sanctuary mastermind?

It would be easy for me to give 1000 reasons why joining the Sacred Sista Sanctuary mastermind is great, but hearing it from someone who has got so much out of it hits different. In this weeks live, I share more in depth about how the sacred space is helping so many sista’s like what you can see from this wonderful email I received.

‘Working with June has been transformational for me. Having attended various programmes on self care and healing it struck me that they could not fully benefit me because they didn’t have the cultural context, or understand the experiences unique to women of African and Caribbean descent.

June provides a safe space where you can speak your truth without judgment or criticism, which gives you confidence to learn how to set healthy boundaries with your friends and family. Working with her has allowed me to look deep within, to have significant insights and breakthroughs which I would not have accomplished if I was on this healing journey on my own.

She gives toolkits on how we as Black women can navigate the system of racism we live under; she helps us find the language to articulate what it means to live under this system that for a long time I could not name, and for a long time not even aware was affecting me.

This work is not easy. It compels you to question everything about who you are and whether holding on to certain beliefs are benefitting you. To live authentically you’ve got to do work like this; and with lots of humor, straight talking and love, June is your guide on how to confront social and cultural sacred cows and taboos, and to lay bare the ways Black women have had to literally carry the burden of the world. Once you know you can’t un-know.’

Angie Osbourne.

Best selling Author of 100 Great Black Britain’s.

To join the Sanctuary go to www.join.juneallen.net

What is emotional safety for black women?

After quite an emotional week last week I felt so grateful for my support network who were able to hold me through the melt down. With so many of the women I work with feeling grateful for  the space I hold for them to be vulnerable, I want to share my take on what is emotional safety and what it means for black women in their respective support spaces.

  1. Can they hear you?
  2. Can they see you?
  3. Can they feel you?
  4. Can they hold you?
  5. Can they walk with you?

Intrigued? Watch for a deeper exploration.